On traveling alone

Well, I decided to go ahead with it!  Me. In Colombia from July 31 to August 9.  I’ve never been to South America before.

I was invited to a conference in Cali, Colombia, but I had to buy the airfare myself.  I went back and forth on this decision for a long time.  I’ve traveled alone, but since I moved to Hawaii, I’ve kind of said that I’m going to hold out for this prince charming who wants to see the world with me and protect me from potential rapists and kidnappers.   After a couple of shady encounters riding trains around India, I’ve been a little gunshy about going on my own.  And in my sadness over being single, I haven’t thought I could stand to be asked if I’m married by the more family-oriented third world, where I am most certainly already a spinster.

But you see – I had nearly 100,000 miles left from the great long distance heartbreaker that was Mr. Faraway.  I just need to spend them.  Other girls might buy shoes, but I buy plane tickets.  I cannot believe I’m doing it!  (I’m totally terrified).

Does anyone know a good website that might connect single travelers?

Captain R wanted to backpack to Japan with me when he met me, but now that he’s gotten to know me, he’s retracted his offer, claiming financial difficulty.  It’s becoming more clear that although I like him a lot, he really isn’t ready for anything, and I have to respect that.

Rant of the day:  Feminism did what it was supposed to – liberate women.  But it also seems to have set women up for a life with a lot of loneliness. Men just have no social pressure to commit to a girl anymore.  So thanks, ladies of the fifties and sixties, for letting me do my PhD and travel to Colombia, but no thanks on not thinking out how to make sure men are still in our lives.


About tidewater

thirty-something, mostly single, finding a path.
This entry was posted in Feminism, Long distance and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to On traveling alone

  1. reocochran says:

    Now, wait a minute! Are you blaming the women who worked their butts off for our freedoms and tried to get us equal opportunities? Come on, girl! Don’t get sad about the adventure of your trip on your own! If I had money and frequent flyer miles, I would go! I was a professional teacher for years, married a man I met at church! We lost our house due to his sitting on his behind for 2 years, I lost my career working as a waitress at Cracker Barrel 4 nights a week to get my Master’s Degree by the time No Child Left Behind Act got into place (2008 with a professional license for El Ed but loving my 9 years of special ed) Boohoo, I work now at a Distribution Center (think factory) live in a one bedroom apt. with my 27 year old daughter who has all her college loans based on both my ex’s professional job that he got downsized and my professional job that I was unable to reach the deadline. I am content, happy and seeking men anywhere i can find them, because I see life as a cup 1/2 full! Please go, enjoy your trip and try to believe there is a purpose or meaning to all of this. I lost a teaching coworker at the same time I lost my 3 bedroom house that we built from the ground up, every wall painted or muraled with my own artwork, and she died of cancer at age 43. Grounds you, doesn’t it?

    • tidewater says:

      You are an inspiration in your tenacity and positivity, and I’m sorry for my sour words in the post last night. I regretted them before I really woke up this morning!

      Everyone has their own struggles, and me whining about having too much opportunity for travel and education is likely to fall on deaf ears. This is life’s path for me for the moment, and it is a quite interesting path!

  2. Have fun and be safe! 🙂

  3. tidewater says:

    Thanks, I’ll try not to get into too much trouble.

  4. ellaflutter says:

    That’s excellent! Have an amazing trip. And get into a great headspace before you head out there, it’s going to be so wonderful.

    I understand your rant. Sometimes, we are allowed to. But like the other women here said, of course there’s so much more than that and the women before us gave us options. Men always find ways to be idiots, right? Haha. Well really it’s always complex between people, especially men and women. No matter the time and social conditions, things will be tricky. Still, I feel your rant!

    Now go be awesome 😉

mahalo for your comment!

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