Mums the word

I love to tell a good story.  I sometimes feel like my life is just a collection of stories.  I attract eccentric people, and I love hearing people’s life path.  Hence, the attempt at the Portraits here on this blog.

But, when you are entering in to a relationship with someone new, it’s not entirely obvious for me (someone with subpar social skills) to know where to stop.  Romeo and I have had sort of a whirlwind couple of weeks.  We are still in that in between for new friends where you have so much to say, so much past to learn.  Because of my decade of singleness (approximately) and traveling, I have lots and lots of little mementos that come up randomly.  Romeo, having been married for 8 of those last 10 years, has fewer stories – or at least fewer characters to his story.

The wise move here is to just scour my background, clean it up and make it like a blank white slate.  I am not playing this wisely.  In thinking about it with friends, I realized that I must have 100 first dates who represent sort of a game of “around the world”.  There’s the Dominican, the Indian, the Gambian, the Uruguayan, the Panamanian, the German, the French (blech), the Jamaican, the Greek, the New Zealander, the Brit, the Mexican(s), the Hawaiian.  Poor East Asia suffers from a lack of representation, as does the Arab world.  The Americans have their own ticks that aren’t so connected to where they are from, although the Georgia boy is still on my mind sometimes.  I actually know quite a bit of geography from this game.

More than that, I know a lot of random things about random professions because I’ve “interviewed” (or been on dates with) them.  The librarian, the accountant, the real estate agent, the botanist, the software engineer, the construction project manager, the soccer coach, the actor, the farmer.

I am *really* getting to know Romeo, not sort of.  These are the kind of talks that last for hours on the beach after a glass of wine.  And I keep getting stuck on the “And then I was here with …” or “I can distinguish between these bird calls because…” or “… Honestly, listening to my own story, the word “floozy” comes to mind – but I’ve just met so many damn people.  I try to meet people and hear stories, and now I don’t know how to explain that very well.

After every date with Romeo, I feel young again.  I laugh to myself all day long and remember my courage (or naivete?) at traveling the world.  I remember the times from not all that long ago where marriage and babies were absolutely not a concern, but living a big and beautiful and colorful life were the most important thing.  I remember how I love to meet strangers and hear stories.  This is amazing.



About tidewater

thirty-something, mostly single, finding a path.
This entry was posted in Dating, Life path and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Mums the word

  1. Whenever I meet a guy for the first time or we’ve gone out a couple of times, I get nervous about how much I should say. I like to talk, once I feel comfortable enough to, and I can go on and on if I’m allowed to. But when it comes to dating, this can be tricky. A guy once told me that no guy wants to hear the heavy stuff so soon into things. I get it, but what if what you mostly have is heavy stuff? What else is there to say? And that’s where I feel I am. I have more bad things than good things to talk about. And so because I don’t want to scare them away so quickly, I watch what I say. Except for the times when I know I won’t be seeing the guy again. Then I bring up things from my past because I know it will scare them off. And it usually does.

  2. reocochran says:

    I ended up nominating you for the Sunshine Award on my recent post! You deserve a smile and sunshine because you have really been writing well and I have learned through your posts! You are inspiring!

  3. reocochran says:

    You have been showing an interest more in settling down. I will be interested in that new phase of your life. It is great that your 100 or more dates were from around the world, whereas all but one were from Ohio of my 100 dates last year. I still have a few left to tell but not nearly as wild and fun as your stories!

mahalo for your comment!

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