Fear, continued

Okay, everybody.  I think I figured it out.  I am afraid that I won’t be able to handle it.  That is the key word.  No matter what I am afraid of (never having children, being alone, childbirth), I am not really afraid of *it*, but afraid that I won’t be able to deal with the outcome.

Of course all fears are a little bit based in reality.  Of course I could be horribly deformed, I could end up alone, I could never have children, but really, if you just turn the whole thing just a little bit – if I know that I can deal with it because I am strong, and worthy and supported, it all seems less scary.

To paraphrase my teacher –

Approach the world as if you are a rich person and can really have anything you want, and it will be true.

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About tidewater

thirty-something, mostly single, finding a path.
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